My boy

I want to talk a little bit about my boy. My oldest son. He is 14 years old, going on 25. He's my rock. I don't know what I would have done with out him in my life. Let me give a little background. I was 17 years old when I had him, 2 months before my 18th birthday. I thought I had life all figured out. I knew I was ready for motherhood, I just knew it. I was thinking of all the things I would show him and teach him. I didn't realize just how much he would teach me! I couldn't wait to see his little face, and I knew from the moment I found out I was pregnant that it was a boy! I just knew. 
The day came that he joined us, and I was so excited, immature as I was. I got up early, because I was induced, took a shower, did my hair & makeup. Yup hair & makeup folks, to have a baby! LOL! Anyway, he came into this world and forever changed who I was. 
Now don't get me wrong, I was not then, nor do I claim to have ever been the perfect parent. I made a lot of mistakes. I did a lot of bad things that could have really hurt him. I won't make excuses, I decided to have a child, which therefore ended my childhood. Or at least it should have. I did things I shouldn't have done. But the one thing I always did, was love him. I loved him more than anything in the entire world. I loved him so much that at one point in my young life, I thought I wasn't good enough to be his mom, and that he'd be better off with out me. God had other plans. 

Here we are! 

I watched this little baby that I helped make, grow from a tiny little baby who had to lay in the sunlight of the window because he was just a little to jaundiced, to a rough & tumble toddler who wasn't really scared of anything. From there he grew into the school age little boy, that I cried my eyes out after watching him get on his school bus for his first day of kindergarten. Watching him play the violin, and listening to him come home and read to me...Read! This little person, I made, is reading! LOL! I think I save every picture he ever drew for me, I'm pretty sure I have most of them somewhere. Because this boy has been drawing since he could hold a pencil. Beautiful artwork, some silly, all beautiful (in a mother's eyes). The next thing I know...BAM! He's in middle school. Girls, and attitude, and drawing, more drawing. Homework, that I don't understand, and seeing him change. Now, I look at my little boy, and he's not. He's not little at all. He's big, and growing up faster than I can keep track. My heart is sad a little, because I know that someday, he will be all grown up. But more than anything, I'm proud! I'm so very proud of the young man he is becoming. Responsible, and caring, hard working, and sweet! He's playing football this year, his freshman year in high school. Which is the reason I am writing this. My baby boy, is a freshman! I remember like it was yesterday him being in diapers, learning to crawl, falling asleep in his swing. Learning to walk, run, ride a bike... Where has the time gone? I don't know. I do know that I have a very beautiful young man for a son, and without him, I wouldn't be the person I am today, and my life would be missing something. So, before I start balling uncontrollably, I will end it here. I love you Eric Anthony. I have enjoyed watching you grow up. I cannot wait to see what you become, and the wonderful things you will bring to this world. Thank you for blessing my life and making me a mommy! I love you always!